I'm a Moxi, You're a Moxi ... Hey Let's Be Friends

I hate to be a buzz kill, but summer is over.

I know. I suck. And I also know that the sweet, optimistic, summer loving bunch of you is saying, "No, Deb. Summer is not over. It's not. It's only early August. We have weeks of summer left. We can finally go to the pool because the monsoonal rains seem to have stopped. So shut up."

Sorry friends. Summer. Is. Over.

For me, and anyone else who has kids under the age of 16 but over the age of 6 knows, summer ends the moment fall sports begin. Starting in late July, I was back at it, driving my beloved offspring to different locations every day. Six-day practice schedules. Five-day camps. Optional conditioning sessions (which aren't really optional, by the way).

And I am not alone.  I know this because I see a bunch of other moms at the same places I am.  Expansive parking lots, school gyms, park like settings that hold us captive for 1.5 to 2 hours at a time. We are a hardened, professional, adept group of gas guzzling, coffee swilling, carpooling taxis. We are moms who drive taxis. We are moxi's. Yes, we are MOXI'S.

This got me thinking.  Why not take our self-induced schedules of imprisonment and turn them into a business opportunity?  We could, say, acknowledge that we are driving around all the time anyway, and perhaps, charge people to come along with us. We could drop them where they need to be for a small fare.  We'd be better than a taxi; we have nicer vehicles, we don't overuse the gross smelling air freshener and we drive much more safely.  I love this idea!

Then, it hit me.

Frickin Über.

Damn it!

I went onto the Uber website, clicked on the options of "becoming a driver" and here is what Uber told me:

Image from Uber.com. 

I mean, look at her. She's cool. She's dressed like us. She has a smaller vehicle than most of us (no carpooling in that) but we can let that slide.  We can earn great money as an independent contractor. Get paid weekly. Be our own boss on our own schedule.

But wait, there's more!

Image from Uber.com

We can turn our cars into money machines!  We can cash in on the action!

Image from Uber.com

This is my favorite part of the job...drive when I want. I mean, we Moxi's don't get to drive when we want. That's the very definition of being a Moxi - driving around all the times we don't want. 8 am Saturday; 10 pm weeknights. If I really drove around when I wanted, it would probably be a smallish window from 10 am to 10:07 am.  Done.

So, maybe my idea of operationalizing all of us Moxi's won't work. It's already been done and anyway, kids don't have a lot of cash.  So, getting paid will have to stick to the more traditional forms of payment we're used to. Things like:

Can we stop for ice cream on the way home?
Why were you late?
I told you we had to take Jake home...
They added an extra practice time this week
We are going an hour later than the schedule says
Gas just went about $4 a gallon
You need new tires
I can't come to book club

And then there's the payment we all really want:

"Thanks mom. I know how much you give up for me and I love you. I know you spend all your time driving us around and I appreciate it."

It may not sound exactly like that, but every once in a while, the sentiment is there. And I know I speak for all Moxi's when I say that hearing that, or getting that hug, or having a child run toward the car after a practice, or having them say "are you going to stay and watch me?" is worth all the driving and the wear and tear and the end of summer.

I am a Moxi. You are a Moxi. And we love it.

Uber ain't got nothin on us.

Now get in your minivan and get going! You're late to practice!